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Finality in Motherhood

March 7, 2024

Finality in motherhood

You’re still a mother,

But never again

Shut down like a broken carnival ride

Or a dead flower waiting on spring’s renewal

Pieces of you voted obsolete

By logical minds,

Finances,

And spent endurance

It’s okay to be done,

To gather the pieces of yourself

To quilt tattered threads until you’re whole once again

But to still yearn for the flutter of new life

For newborn sounds and scrunched up legs

Oxytocin highs and milky smiles

Footy pajamas and linen swaddles

Sloppy kisses and misspoken words

That chapter is vivid

Colors abound,

Roped off by velvet,

Forever entombed and cherished

Finality, reality

Everything must end,

But my footsteps aren’t lonely

They don’t echo in vacant chambers

I walk with unbridled laughter,

Goldfish in my pockets

And questions of the universe

Mother forever

But never again

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