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i am often lost –

March 16, 2024

i’m often lost –

seeking meaning amongst the chirping of the wind

amidst the trees and the shadows of their leaves 

– the soil of the Earth 

with my bare feet buried in the forest vines and flowerless greens 

following the footprints of the sun 

smelling like the wind intertwined with a herbaceous tint

and subtle scent of decomposing leaves

 

and when i’m often lost –

in the glare of the past 

and the heavy deep Black Sea 

the whispers of the birds 

and the weight of the silver sky above

i feel this calmness over me 

– for being lost is beautiful 

though often carries bitter taste

and sadness over me

 

because i’m often lost 

i’ve hurried through the nows

through the nights and through the weeks

where the years have passed

and decades turned to sprints

the accessories of time – reminders of a little life

 

but when i’m often lost

i look at the heights of linden trees 

from beneath the shadows of their leafy crowns

in the embrace of their deep-wide spreading roots

and count the clouds above 

oh – how little all this makes me feel

oh – how bigger life is in comparison – to me

 

or when i’m often lost

i go to feel the biting sand at the soles of my feet

and let the wind brush through my five-day unwashed hair and

talk me into returning to the motherlands

 

and here i ask 

of myself – what’s left 

– of life

– of me – of her within

of everything we hurried through and everything we missed and did not see



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