Robin Alvarez’s journey from trauma to triumph is a testament to the resilience of the human spirit. What began as a simple writing exercise in a memoir class blossomed into a profound exploration of her own life story—a journey of reclaiming her voice after years of feeling silenced. Through the cathartic process of rewriting her experiences, Robin transformed pain into power, showing us that healing is possible, even after the darkest moments. Her story reminds us that we all have the strength within to confront our past, rewrite our narratives, and emerge stronger on the other side.
What initially inspired you to rewrite your story?
Initially, the rewrite of this story was merely a writing exercise in a creative memoir writing class. But as I retold a near-death experience of surfing during a hurricane, my professor pushed me to explore why I would go out into such a dangerous situation. This drove me to reflect on all the things I was struggling with at that moment in my life when, as a seventeen-year-old, I felt isolated from my family and friends and trapped in an abusive relationship. Months after that class ended, the story was still resonating in my heart. I realized I had a lot to say about feeling voiceless and reclaiming my sense of self as I was still healing over a decade later. I had to write that story and doing it as a Little Mermaid retelling, in which my main character feels like she has to give up her voice to escape, gave me such a great frame to show what someone would give up to escape, and what they might discover when they give up parts of themselves.
Can you share a specific detail about your journey of rewriting your story that was a turning point for you?
First drafts can be super rough because writers are still exploring what they want to say and how they want to say it. There were many moments, when working through that first draft, when I had a lot of questions about how I’d gotten into such a scary situation. I’d blamed myself for years for so much of it. In searching for those answers, doing the research, I realized there were so many things that weren’t my fault. Reasons I’d internalized and just accepted the blame for were suddenly being looked at with a new lens. In those moments, I felt my decade-old wounds healing instead of just being covered up.
Did you experience any mental health challenges while reliving your trauma? How did you cope with them?
Absolutely. I felt anger and fear renewed while reliving the trauma. I was more irritable around everyone, and I didn’t like myself very much. At times in my writing, it felt like a mistake to relive it. Then there were moments where it felt important to me and maybe for others who would hear this story. Coping meant talking things out with my family and friends. That wasn’t something I did when I was going through the trauma because I felt silenced. Even after the traumatic events happened, I stayed quiet because I thought it would be easier to move on. Just getting to speak about these terrible things and feel safe to do that because I have family and friends I trust helped me realize I’m not where I used to be. I’m in a better place because I’d chosen good people to be around, and they chose me too.
What advice would you give to women who might be hesitant to revisit past traumas?
Take your time. Healing is a personal journey and it should happen at your own pace. It’s also okay to take breaks if you start to feel overwhelmed and come back when you’re ready.
Beyond the challenges, what were some of the most rewarding aspects of rewriting your story?
One of the most rewarding aspects of rewriting my story was feeling like I finally had a voice. That I would be talked over and that the space was mine to explore. Rewriting the story gave me back my power.
How has rewriting your story impacted your mental and emotional well-being?
While rewriting it, there were moments when I didn’t feel strong or well. There were also times I felt stronger and healthier than I’d ever been. Now that it’s over, my mental and emotional well-being are better than they ever have been. But I think that has a lot to do with looking for answers to questions I didn’t know I had before. There was closure for that part of myself I’d hated, when I should have loved my past self more. She really needed it.
Did you have any support system in place while rewriting your story? If so, how did they help you?
I always have a support system in place because I’m still always healing. I lean on my family and friends in a way I didn’t before with communication. I talk things out with them even if those pesky feelings don’t feel important. Sometimes, just saying things aloud gives me perspective, but it also strengthens my bonds with them.
Do you feel a sense of empowerment or liberation after rewriting your story?
Writing When Oceans Rise was a deeply personal journey that allowed me to confront and transform my own experiences with abuse into a narrative that resonated with me while also, hopefully, empowering others. It gave me the chance to explore my emotions and experiences that were both healing and freeing. I found a renewed sense of agency over my story.
How can women identify and challenge negative self-beliefs that may be holding them back?
I’m not a professional, so I can only speak to what works for me and hope that it might resonate. Something that works for me is journaling. Specifically, I participate in an activity where I write continuously for three pages as if it is my stream of consciousness. I let myself express all of the negative thoughts, feelings, and emotions. I also let myself express positive thoughts if they are part of that stream of consciousness. I don’t edit myself or slow down to think. This helps me get out all the useless noise that wants to play over and over in my head. It gives me perspective on things I might not want to face and lets me vent.
What does “strength” mean to you in the context of overcoming challenges?
Strength is a deeply personal journey that exists on a spectrum and is different for everyone. For me, sometimes strength was just getting up in the morning. As the years went by, strength was the ability to say what I wanted and needed and to know I wasn’t asking for too much. Now strength is my ability to speak on these issues, even when it still makes me feel weak.
Besides writing, are there other creative outlets that you find helpful for processing difficult experiences?
I love learning new things. I like to tell people my real hobby is having hobbies because I’m more interested in learning a new skill like woodworking and knitting, and then moving on to the next thing I can get my hands on. The process of learning a new skill helps me block out negative thoughts when processing difficult experiences because my brain is actively focused. When I already know how to do a hobby, the intrusive thoughts become too loud.
What is the most important message you want to share with other women who are facing similar struggles?
You are not alone and your voice matters. Be kind to yourself because this journey isn’t easy, and know that every step forward, no matter how small, is a testament to your resilience.
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