Jasmine Gayle’s journey is a powerful testament to the transformative power of storytelling and personal growth. As a writing coach, Jasmine empowers women to break free from self-limiting beliefs, find their unique voices, and embrace their creative potential. Her own experiences, from navigating job loss and personal challenges to finding clarity and confidence through coaching, have shaped her approach to helping others. Jasmine’s passion lies in guiding writers to rewrite the narratives they tell themselves, unlocking the courage to share their stories and inspire others.
What led you to focus on writing coaching, and how did your personal experiences shape this decision?
I have been writing since I was 7, really. I remember knowing I wanted to be a writer and transport people’s minds into different world. Well, that passion went all the way to school. I got a B.A in Writing in 2017 from Ithaca College. In 2020, I lost my job and my housing situation went left. I had to move back home. In 2021, I invested in a coach and that changed my life. Helped me see I can do anything. It was then I decided I wanted to give that same power and confidence to writers.
Can you share more about the “meta-focus” of your work and how it influences the storytelling process for women writers?
We’re all telling ourselves a story. A story about who we are, where we come from, the job we have, the people we date, but most importantly what that says about us and who we can be. That’s everything writing does. Show us who we are. And when you can identify the story you live in, you can translate that to your characters, their worlds, where they come from and who they think they are.
How do you help women writers confront and dismantle their self-limiting beliefs through your coaching?
The women I work with really want to feel good and confident in their writing so it’s a collaborative process. We’re at point A and they want to get to point B. Our thoughts and beliefs create our reality. Usually in some way, they may be believing something about themselves or the creative process that’s hindering them. I help them see that and give them the option and power to choose differently.
What are some common mental barriers you see women writers struggle with, and how do you address them?
Oh, let’s see. Perfectionism, imposter syndrome, believing they are a good writer or if they’re idea is even worth exploring. Usually the root of thar iss fear of failure. Fear of not being good enough. We want to protect ourselves from pain, disappointment which is human and normal. But sometimes fear does not have our best interest at heart. It doesn’t help us see what IS possible for us. We think fear is 100% correct and it’s not. I help writers see when they are engaging in those patterns. I help them see they don’t have to keep chosing that pattern. They can prove their worst fears wrong. They can really be and write the way they want to.
How has your own journey with self-narrative impacted your approach to coaching others?
Well, I used to think that being hyper critical of things made me smart but it in hindsight it was a guise for how hurt and scared I was. I used to think being really hard on myself would “beat me” in submission and make me disciplined. I had an inner dialogue that I was broken. The moment I changed all those narratives to a more compassionate one was when I saw the most profound and sustainable change in my life.
Once you do that inner work on yourself. You can see it in others. I start getting curious when I see that behavior pop up in sessions try to get to the root of whether or not that’s helping their goals and invite hem make a different decision that aligns with the type of writer they want to be.
Can you describe a transformative moment or success story from your work with clients?
Certainly! She was a waitress and has always loved writing and has written tons of poetry. I remember in our first conversation she said, she didn’t think she had what it took to be published. Like published people had “real talent” or something and she believed she didn’t. I got really real with her and asked: “How is it possible that accolades have nothing to with talent? What would it mean, for you if you thought you were talented?” After 3 months together, she got published in a Humana Obscura. I asked her how it felt, she said she felt like an empowered poet.
What challenges have you faced in your coaching career, and how have you overcome them?
How do you maintain your own mental well-being while helping others tackle their self-limiting beliefs?
I actually accept where I am and what I’m feeling and adjust accordingly. I’ve been in therapy for some years and that has given me many tools to self-soothe. I meditate. I move my body. I try yo eat healthy. But it’s not about feeling perfect or happy all of the time. I’ve learned to stop making myself wrong for how I feel. I work with my emotions not against them. That level of grace and compassion is how I keep going and I show other women they can do the same.
What role does mindset play in the writing process, and why is it crucial for writers to address?
Well your mind is the vessel in which your story is coming through. So got to keep it open to possibilities and release control. That’s where a lot of people get messed up. They convince themselves it has to go a specific way for it to work. That’s not always the case.
If your mind is working against you, it’s probably working against your creativity and then a bit of your soul’s fulfillment in my opinion. That’s why writers can live in such dread because they dont know how to master their mind, yet. If they don’t learn how to do that, they may miss out on writing the book of their dreams. I invite them to observe their thoughts and not believe every single one.
How do you stay motivated and inspired in your own writing and coaching work?
A good coach also has a coach! And I self -coach from time to time. That work is so powerful, I continue to invest in other coaches to help me with my blind spots. I read, a lot. I watch movies, a lot. I go on walks. But most of all I listen to my intuition. That will always lead you in the right direction.
What advice would you give to women who are struggling with their self-narrative and looking to start writing?
If you feel that conviction and continual compulsion to write, then you are a writer. It’s not always easy but if you love it, that’s a good sign. Be kind yourself. You are co-creating with something magical. Get help and support because you can’t do it alone. The real succes is helping someone feel something with your words.
How do you integrate your understanding of personal stories into your coaching techniques?
Can you share any specific techniques or exercises you use to help writers improve their self-belief?
Yeah. Again I try to introduce possibility to them by introducing certain questions.
How is it possible that you can be afraid of what people will think and your writing is still impactful?
Sometimes we think in all-or-nothing. Either I’m good or bad. But I try to help them see how it’s possible to be afraid and still be good. Not every thought we have is true.
What are some of the biggest misconceptions about writing and self-narrative that you encounter in your work?
That writing is a talent and only some people “got it.” It’s not. It’s a skill like anything else. And if you practice, you will get better.
What message or piece of advice would you offer to women who are hesitant to share their stories because of self-doubt?
If that story keeps gnawing at you, it’s meant to come through you. Liz Gilbert talks about this in “Big Magic” where story ideas are looking to come through the people who are willing to listen to that call.
It’s ultimately up to you, what you decide to do with your story. But know you may be giving the answers to someone else’s life sorrows because you were brave enough to tell your own.
IG: @thisisjaaminegayle
W: www.jgayle.com
