Starting a new journey later in life can be daunting, but for Alexandra Antonopoulos, the decision to dive into her passion for music was a lifeline. As the creative force behind Honeycrush, Alexandra shares her deeply personal and inspiring story of overcoming fear and internalized ageism to pursue her dreams. In this interview, she opens up about the pivotal moments and challenges she faced, the joy of creating music, and the rewarding experiences that have shaped her journey. Her words serve as a powerful reminder that it’s never too late to follow your passions and that the pursuit of happiness and self-fulfillment is always worth the effort.
How did you overcome the fear and internalized ageism when starting your musical journey?
I needed to make music or I was going to implode. I think when you have stakes that high — your overall mental health and potentially living the rest of your life miserable because you didn’t go for it — it’s very easy to get over your doubts and any prejudices you might have. I’d gotten progressively more miserable realizing that music was something I wanted to do but wasn’t doing and I knew my options were either go for it or spend the rest of my life in regret.
Can you describe the moment when you first picked up the guitar and how it felt?
The guitar felt huge and I felt really incapable. But I also felt so joyful and like I’d just won a prize. I was excited to start and I knew that that moment was going to be the hardest moment, because it was the point at which I’d know the least, but that every moment thereafter I’d know more, feel more comfortable, be closer to playing some notes! Most importantly I knew I’d given myself permission to actually try writing a song, to finally give myself the chance to make music, instead of wondering if I could.
What challenges did you face while learning to play, produce, and write music?
The challenge to sit down and work on something that you can’t do yet is a big hurdle. I think that’s why a lot of people quit. Forcing yourself to try to play a chord when your hands can’t do it yet is frustrating but that’s the growth part. My partner is a musician so it was always nerve-wracking to share something I’d written with them because you have no frame of reference to know whether what you’ve made is “good” but all these years of emotions — insecurities and pride and self-doubt but fierce ambition — all kind of bumping up against each other in your brain as you play it for them. The first year took a lot of emotional resilience. I was really sensitive about it even when I thought I wasn’t.
What has been the most rewarding experience since you started Honeycrush?
What I’m working on now is definitely the most exciting thing I’ve done so far. Learning to play really killer shows with my band and shaping the direction of our sound has been so special. Feeling like I’m making conscious choices instead of just seeing what comes out has been artistically very rewarding.
How did it feel to have one of your songs picked up by a TV show?
It was surreal. Debi Mazar was in the scene and I was just thinking, “Wow, that’s Debi Mazar,” haha. An actress I’ve seen my whole life in the same scene as my song! It was incredible and I felt very lucky.
What advice would you give to other women who feel like they might be “too old” to start pursuing their passions?
The alternative is being unhappy for the rest of your life. Does that sound more appealing than worrying someone somewhere might say you’re “too old” for something? You just have to do it. You owe yourself the happiness, the satisfaction of being in alignment with your truest self, and fuck the idiots who say shit like that. They’re miserable.
How do you stay motivated and inspired to keep creating and performing?
I relate to the world through music. I could sit in a room all day and write songs. And I truly feel like I’m in harmony with the universe when I’m singing. The love of it doesn’t require any motivation, but I know the business is tough. I have a lot of energy to write and learn and fight to book shows or drive a long way to a practice space or work extra freelance hours to afford a van rental because this almost didn’t happen. I’m grateful every day that I woke up and finally trusted myself. If the day ever comes that I don’t feel that way, I’ll stop. But I doubt I’ll ever stop.
Can you share any upcoming projects or goals you have for Honeycrush?
Right now, we’re getting ready to play our first out of town shows and our first summer festivals. I can’t believe I’m even saying that because a year ago I was so nervous to play at an open mic that I was always on the verge of tears. And a new EP will be coming out late fall that feels like the best work I’ve done yet. I just want to play for everyone in the world and keep experiencing the euphoria of making music.
What message do you hope your music conveys to your listeners?
I write a lot about self-discovery and the experience of being a woman, typically by excavating a lot of painful experiences from my own life. Figuring out who you are and what you’re about can be messy but it’s important and I hope listeners relate to that.
