I don’t know about you, but I am sick and tired of feeling sick and tired.
As the days go on and life throws more and more curve balls I can’t help but feel like every time I try to do the right thing and solve my problems that I am just making it worse.
‘There’s no time for tears or for depression to kick in’ is what I tell myself. But when you keep feeling like you’re letting your loved ones down, what do you do? How do you fix it?
I honestly can’t even answer that. There’s so much going on and so many emotions are bubbling up under the surface that I keep forcing down. I know that’s not good, but every time I think: ‘hey, you should talk to someone,’ I talk myself out of it. I keep thinking everyone has problems; there are people dealing with problems worse than yours, don’t just thrust that on them.
I am so sick and tired of feeling sick and tired.
I feel super alone, I’m having money problems (but I mean who isn’t?), I’m stressing about my future and whether or not I actually have a purpose to serve in life.
Basically I’m having an existential crisis every hour on the hour, and I can’t help but think maybe cupcakes will help my problematic soul and ever crying heart. I’ll tell you this, the cupcakes are a better alternative to the alcohol or drugs that I could be consuming to ease the pain, so I guess that’s a good thing.
Then I have to deal with my body image issues on top of that, and that’s a whole butt load more of stress that I’ve been dealing with my whole lifetime. The tears are just flowing endlessly at this point.
Now, you’re probably asking yourself what any of this is going to amount to, right?
Easy. My point is that we all have problems; we are all messy in our own ways and we try so hard to show the world a clean and happy face even in trying times. I’m guilty of this and I like to think that I’m not alone in this. So, here I am telling the world that I am having a very messy time and it’s okay. I’ll get through it because well, I have to, but also because this is just one of those moments in life where things aren’t going the way I would like them to and that’s okay. I’ll find a way to fix the problem and the next moment will hopefully be filled with laughter, smiles and happy cupcakes, not sad ones.
So, I raise a cupcake to the sad and messy times because without them the happy times wouldn’t feel as amazing as they do when we have them.
