Spirituality and Self-help

FIVE STEPS TO STOP FEELING STUCK AND EMPOWER YOURSELF

Are you feeling stuck and struggle? Do you feel helpless, disempowered and down? Do you feel that there is something more out there but you just can’t seem to get a hold of it? Are you hard on yourself and consistently put yourself down? We have all been there, and it can be so challenging! But you can stop feeling stuck and you can live the life of your dreams. You can feel confident, and you can accept yourself just as you are right now. Are you ready to live the life you truly deserve? I have 5 steps for you to un-stuck yourself: Self-awareness is an absolute key to every single change in your life. For instance, if you want to loose weight, you first need to be aware that you don’t like your wobbly bits right now. So when you are aware of it, you can make a decision about what you want...

I HAVE TO SAVE MYSELF

I lay on the bed waiting for something to happen. We had talked about all sorts of fantasies in our relationship, but each day looked the same, luxuriating to the point of suffocation. He pulled the computer over to rest on his chest as he perused the internet, waiting for noise to stop downstairs so that he could potentially make his first meal after hours and hours of waiting, “I don’t want to go downstairs because there are people down there,” he would say, “I am not going down there.” I began to realize that I was waiting for something that was never going to come. Years could be filled up with this waiting: sitting on beds, looking over at a living corpse just waiting to rot and die, and for what? I was doing this to myself; I was choosing to take the easier way out, staying in a rela...

I HATE YOU

“I HATE YOU!” Hate is a more powerful feeling than love. It runs deeper, it affects the heart at a higher level and it can infect the soul, ultimately all your life. And just like love, hate takes two. All these consequences of hate, whether you are the one who feels or expresses it or the one who is targeted by it, depend on the level of love we have for the other person involved in the situation. When a stranger tells you how much they hate you, it shouldn’t mean much because you didn’t invest any love in them anyway. When a friend however, says the same, it can break your heart. You will relive in your head your good times and wonder what part of your history led to such harsh feelings. But when your husband tells you that he hates you…that can kill you. Not literally, but it can kill y...

FOUR WORDS

Anxiety and depression often seem to go hand in hand. It can happen to anyone yet you’re still left feeling like you’re the only one who suffers from it. It’s lonely and confusing, not to mention scary. You find yourself questioning every second of your life. You’re suddenly very aware of your heartbeat and the items or people around you. Heat takes over your body but there’s a chance you’re shaking, making others think you’re cold. Sometimes you can sit there with friends around you all the while your head is screaming at you and your limbs to leave. Sometimes you’re doing absolutely nothing and you get overwhelmed with this feeling that you still can’t fully describe. It’s everything from fear to being uncomfortable in your own ...

BOWL OF LIGHT

  Happiness can be found, even in the darkest of times, if only one remembers to turn on the light.                                         -Albus Dumbledore   If you are anything like me, you are a predominately positive person (wow, so many p’s!). You love to laugh, you roll the windows down on summer days, you sing at the top of your lungs. You would be the first person to pick your friend up if she was feeling down. But, you are also human. And, if you are anything like me there are days when you find yourself stuck in a cycle of negative thoughts. Maybe something went wrong at work or you had a fight with a family member. Maybe nothing necessarily happened to cause this pattern of thinking but it seems impossible to make your way out of the downward spiral. First, let ...

WHAT ON EARTH IS EARTHING?

Summer is vast approaching and while half the world’s population are probably shopping or digging out their slip flops, sandals, and summer shoes, here’s me looking forward to bearing all walking shoeless! Walking barefooted on the earth is earthing. It’s not a modern thing and dates to prehistoric India where stamping barefooted on the ground was preparation for an ancient spiritual dance known as Bharatanatyam. The stamping on the earth known as ‘Adavus’ gave women blessings from Mother Earth, empowerment, and grounding. As a child, I used to love running around on the grass and mud barefooted. I felt free. Shoes can be restrictive, and earthing is reverting to nature.  It’s plain to see when children kick off their shoes and trainers when playing. Just as the sun showers us with Vitamin...

THE WOMAN I NEVER THOUGHT I WOULD BE

It was a few hours past midnight and I couldn’t find anything open around the area where I parked my car – which was also my bed at that moment – so I went outside to find some place to hide for me to take a leak. Maybe it was the combination of the cold autumn night and not having anything to eat on that day, but I never felt so exposed to the outside world like that in all my life. I felt so bare, unprotected, and, the saddest thing is, so alone. Have you ever felt like your world as you know it went and crumbled to the ground in just a matter of seconds? Imagine everything you have, everything you worked so hard for, everything that is important to you – your whole world – taken away from you. I remember crying inside the car until the tears couldn’t ...

THE GLAMOROUS TRUTH ABOUT COURAGE

Hello everyone. My name is Nike, I am the owner of the fashion and lifestyle blog SpecsandBlazers. It is my pleasure to share with you the glamorous truth about courage. Truth is…it’s not. It’s not glamorous at all. My story starts on a farm in Abeokuta, Nigeria – my father was a professor but always had this passion for farming. It was by all counts a home that was full love and I recall that at every dinner we had to go outside and pick our own vegetables. (the real organic). Around the age of three I can remember my parents arguing about their daughter – me, my mom would say : “Oh that child she’s so stubborn, she only listens to herself what are we gonna do about her?” My dad would say : she’ll grow out of it. Well…I never did. My behavior continued all throughout pri...

WHY THE TERM “OVERCOME YOUR FEAR” NEEDS A SERIOUS RETHINK

I’ve been consumed by a sense of scarcity lately. I can’t quite put my finger on it, but it’s as though my soul is choking on dust. It seems like this world has limited, depleting resources and I’m always running behind the candy train. My pulse races over the smallest of things slipping through my fingers: the last nacho on the shared plate going into someone else’s mouth, losing one earring from the set, the extra cash on restaurant meals (I can cook at home!). I feel smaller, contained, nervous, fearful that if don’t keep a beady eye on all parts of my life, the things that I hold dear will slip away, or be snatched, irrecoverably. I re-enforce boundaries, protect what I have, hoard my thoughts and my stuff. In my fluster of activity, I’m trying to achieve fullness and satisfaction, but...

THEY SAY I’M SELFISH

Some of us know that “selfish” doesn’t have to have a negative connotation,  but the trait can actually make you a better person. How are you supposed to take care of others if you’re not taking care of yourself?  Sometimes, we need to be selfish. I’m not talking about being  unkind and inconsiderate of others. I mean the part of  responsibility for getting your personal, emotional and physical needs met. Our feelings are important, our bodies are important. Don’t let anything break them. To keep them healthy we have to take good care of them. We  can also become more empathic to others feelings. Sometimes you just need to unplug, and spend some time with yourself.  Do not feel guilty for taking the time you deserve. One of the hardest parts is learning  to lose the guilt when ...

PRETENDING STUPIDITY

It dawned on me today that I pretend I don’t know something in order to get out of not speaking, just in case someone counters what I have to say or asks me questions. I fear looking stupid to others because maybe I don’t ‘speak right’. I do struggle with pronouncing certain vowels, which I attempt to hide by speaking little or avoiding ‘big words’ with too many vowels. So, if someone asks me to elaborate on a topic, anxiety rises in me, and I choke up, stutter, and/or speak too fast. My thoughts either begin to race, and then my words are flipped around and what I wanted to say comes out jumbled, or too fast and I then have to repeat myself. I realized today this happens because as a kid I overheard my father telling my brother, “that’s stupid”. I was seven years old at the ti...

10 WAYS TO BE SELFISH WITHOUT FEELING GUILTY FOR IT

Stop neglecting your health If you don’t take care of your body, it will put a dent on pretty much every other area of your life. The more you take care of yourself, the more your life as a whole benefits from it. It’s crazy how much of an impact this has. So fuel your body with the nutrients it needs + get active. You won’t regret it. You will feel so much more motivated, energetic + happier overall. You are worthy Do you need permission to put yourself first? Thought so. Here’s permission. You deserve a hell of a lot more than what you’re putting yourself through right now. Stop telling yourself you’re not good enough, smart enough, pretty enough, skilled enough, etc. There is so much room for improvement in your life but it’s up to you to put in that work. No matter where you are at in ...

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